(I've waited for six months to post this, mainly to sort out my thoughts and be sure I still felt it/meant it.)

A growing church should be a planting church before it is a building church.

The American church seems to be always growing. Mega-churches line major interstates in most metropolises. Most Americans are familiar with names like Willow Creek or Bethlehem Baptist. Churches with 5000 or more attendees are touted as healthy and thriving. They are models for smaller, struggling churches of oh, 200 or so.

But I want to be part of a small struggling church of 200 or less. I want to be a part of a close-knit community of Christ followers who are struggling because hey, we're human, and we struggle, you know.

When the church that my family was attending (and I was on staff at) made the decision to move quickly ahead with a building project, despite hesitation from multiple staff members and many within the church, a chord was struck within my soul.

See, this church had BLOWN UP. It was huge and fastly growing. Thanks in part to an excellent marketing campaign (yes, shamefully, I once marketed salvation to the masses) and a dynamic speaking pastor (not the same as a dynamic leading pastor or a dynamic relational pastor) this church was THE church to be part of if you were a young, hip, couple or professional family with kids.

Yet, when I surveyed the people “worshiping” around me, the only faces I saw were those of success. Oh I'm not gonna say they all had their lives together, and being on staff I was privy to some intimate details about peoples screw ups and sin lives, but they looked damn good sitting there on Sunday.

Noticeably not diverse, this crowd seemed to enjoy singing, listening, and leaving, and did so with an unrivaled commitment. Yet, when it came time to put your hands and feet to work (serving at the mission, leading a community group) the same people who were eager to write a check were sadly missing.

(Click "read more" below to finish this article.)

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How to know if you have a good marriage:

Buy an office desk.

Not just any office desk.

An "assembly required" office desk.

An "assembly-required" office desk WITH hutch

An "assembly-required" office desk with 28 pages of instructions for the main part and an additional 13 pages of instructions for the hutch.

An "assembly-required" office desk that had over 200 screws, nails, dowels, pegs, and cam locks.

Spend 3 hours assembling said desk. Occasionally put pieces on backwards and re-do. Occasionally drop pieces on your toe or back yourself into a corner because you're building in the smallest room of the house. Sweat, quite a bit, because you don't want to open the windows and let mosquitoes in but it's 75 degrees in the house.

If at the end of the night  you still want to curl up together and watch Breaking Bad (our latest obsession), you've got a keeper.

At the end of the day there is NO ONE else I'd rather build "assembly required" furniture with :)

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Last night, when he woke up in the middle of the night to attend to a peed-through-the-pajamas two-year-old who yelled "DADDY" from the top of the stairs at the top of his lungs, I fell in love with him again.

We've been doing these things for years now - almost eight - and sometimes we slip into a routine that borders mundane. We forget to live the little moments that happen, magically, right before our eyes.

This week, a spontaneous twelve hour road trip, just he and I, talking and laughing and remembering. A late night dinner with our three sons, celebrating a birthday and cracking crab legs, laughing at our youngest, marveling at our oldest, enjoying our middle son's antics. And you agreed to my hairbrained birthday surprise - insisting on the best aquarium and the nicest water dish for our newest reptilian friend. You're a good dad, better than yours, better than mine, better than most. And I fall in love with you again.

Through the late-nights watching It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia I appreciate your sense of humor. Through our arguments and disagreements I appreciate your honesty. You always push me to be more me, even when you don't like it. You always insist on honesty, even when I'm accustomed to half-truths and people pleasing. I am better because of you. And I fall in love with you again.

There are 1000 lives we could have each lived without oneanother. The only one I ever wanted is with you. Every morning, as my feet hit the floor and I pad slowly upstairs to make coffee, even grumpy, even tired, I fall in love with you again.

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