You, my second son, share with me a unique position. We are both the second born children in our families. You though, are and always will be, smack dab in the middle of siblings, where I, (more or less fortunate - I do not know?) became the older sibling of not one, but three. But in our birth order, we share something special.

I like sharing special things with you. You crack me up, your curiousity and generosity alike. Your tender little heart - the way you'll hit your big brother over and over yelling "NO, NAUGHTY" and the way you'll cry when you actually hurt him. You are a special mix of both "feeler" and "tough." Women, my son, are gonna eat that up.

You're getting more defiant now. I think the "twos" are fast approaching and I am not even close to ready. Even now, with a much smaller brother occupying our home, I think of you as my baby - my littlest one. This last few months you've asserted that you are no longer a baby though. Your vocabulary is improving, you have a great sense of humor. You can almost ride a bike.

In your assertiveness though, there has been lots of room for melting hearts. Mine, in particular. When you run up to me, grubby little hands smearing once-clean faces, and want me to hold you, everything in me wants to hold everything in you and never let you go. I'm here to help you weather the storms in life (and there WILL be storms, that I can promise). And I hope you'll let me in,like you do now, through hugs and quiet conversations. I hope we will later, as we do now, share a love of reading and of adventure. I hope you always dream big and take risks. Only half of them will pan out, thats simple statistics (okay, I always fail at math.) But you'll learn so much it will be worth it.

Right now I'm writing a commencement speech for a highschool graduation that I was honored to be asked to speak at. And I'm contemplating how to send 18-year-olds off into the world when I, only a few years older, haven't gotten it figured out yet. But this, this I can say with confidence, to them, and to you. God, in his unfathomable mercy, is already spinning circles over you. You fill Him with such unspeakable joy, that even I (and I am absolutely DELIGHTED with you) cannot comprehend. And you, as you grow in wisdom, and stature, and favor with God and mankind, are uniquely positioned to impact whatever corner or continent God has called you to.

Some day, and I'm already preparing, I know that I'll have to let go. Everything in me will want everything in you to stay - to relive all the joys we'll have shared over 18 or 19 or 20 odd years. I'll cherish every memory (probably even the times you closed your door and didn't like me so much...) and I'll want to protect you (because, I know, the world isn't always so friendly, isn't always so kind.) But, and I'm already preparing, you're gonna be ready to walk it out. To live the life. To be the unique, in the middle, boy you've already shown me you are. And then, just like now, I'll be insanely proud of the ways you are growing. I'll be overjoyed at the person you've become.

 For now, I'll snuggle you and your "night-night" blankie - never far from your adventures. I'll read the books we've both learned to love and sometimes, on a rare morning, I'll climb in the bottom bunk with you and watch your chest rise and fall, fascinated by the life that somehow, I got to participate in creating. And you, for now and forever, are deeply, unquestionably, sometimes imperfectly, but insanely, loved.

Happy almost Birthday baby big boy.

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